Healing the wounds through words
Crash survivor authors detailed account of night
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The school field trip last fall called for Haley =
Scott=20
DeMaria's 6-year-old son, James, and his class to travel from Annapolis, =
Md., to=20
Baltimore. It would require a routine bus ride.
Until Scott =
DeMaria=20
realized there was no such thing.
The former Notre Dame swimmer =
remembers=20
bursting into tears at the thought of putting the older of her two sons =
on that=20
school bus. So on the morning of the trip, Scott DeMaria instead decided =
to=20
drive James and his buddy the 30 miles.
"I knew there'd come a day when they would have to =
ride a bus=20
and I didn't want to put my fears onto them, but =E2=80=A6" Scott =
DeMaria recalled on=20
the phone from her home in Maryland. "At some point I know I have to let =
them=20
live their own lives. So I had to explain it all to him, and he was=20
OK."
Haley Scott DeMaria is OK, too, these days, even if she =
still hasn't=20
brought herself to board a bus in more than 16 years.
Not since =
the=20
awful, icy night she broke her spine, Jan. 24, 1992, when the chartered =
bus=20
carrying the Notre Dame swim team crashed on the Indiana Toll Road four =
miles=20
from the South Bend exit while returning home from a meet at=20
Northwestern.
The accident claimed the lives of Scott DeMaria's=20
classmates, Meghan Beeler and Colleen Hipp, who were pinned under the =
bus, and=20
forever changed so many others. Scott DeMaria, an 18-year-old freshman =
at the=20
time, broke her spine after the bus rolled over and threw her against a =
window=20
she eventually crawled through to safety.
In a book released =
earlier this=20
week, "What Though The Odds," Scott DeMaria recounts that traumatic trip =
home in=20
painstaking detail: From the reason Beeler moved to the back row (to =
study) to=20
the movie the team watched before the crash ("Dying Young") to where =
every team=20
member was sitting before the bus started sliding down the embankment =
before=20
flipping.
"Wet snow slaps my cheeks and begins to numb my body. I =
start=20
shivering," Scott DeMaria writes. "I cannot fathom what has happened and =
I=20
should probably be thankful that shock shields me from the grim reality =
that=20
lies in a heap in, around and=E2=80=94most sadly of all=E2=80=94under =
this bus."
Scott=20
DeMaria lay still in the snow for about an hour, the most seriously =
injured of=20
the 35 survivors. She couldn't wiggle her toes until five days later. A =
nurse at=20
a South Bend hospital, as Scott DeMaria recalls in the book without =
bitterness,=20
warned her that she needed to accept "the paralysis" she would be =
facing. She=20
never did.
Within a month, Scott DeMaria had learned how to walk =
again=20
but only after crawling on a mat and progressing from a walker to a =
cane. In=20
less than two years after the accident, on Oct. 29, 1993, she was =
swimming=20
competitively again for Notre Dame and won her heat in the 50-yard =
freestyle=20
with a personal-best time of 25.04.
In all, it would take six =
operations=20
to repair Scott DeMaria's spine, including a procedure to fix one of the =
steel=20
rods that her mother found had protruded from her skin and made a bloody =
mess.=20
Scars remain, and not just physical.
Writing the book, a decade =
and a=20
half later, gave Scott DeMaria an opportunity to show everybody how well =
she is=20
healing =E2=80=A6 and perhaps help others struggling to overcome =
personal=20
trauma.
"In many ways it was exciting to do this because I'm at =
such a=20
good place in my life," Scott DeMaria said.
She's 34 and lives =
with=20
husband Jamie, a pharmaceutical executive, and their two sons in =
Annapolis.=20
Scott DeMaria recently ran a 10K race, once competed in the Los Angeles =
Marathon=20
and has resumed swimming for fun.
Occasional numbness in her =
back, legs=20
and feet serve as a constant reminder of the most harrowing night of her =
life,=20
but Scott DeMaria smiles through any pain. Some of her best friends in =
the=20
neighborhood didn't even know about the bus crash until a couple of =
years=20
ago.
She had passed on two book proposals and a TV movie deal in =
the=20
years since the accident before deciding that sharing her story now made =
sense.
"It was hard reliving it at times," she acknowledged. =
"There were=20
plenty of tears, but happy tears."
Many of them have been shed =
with the=20
Beeler and Hipp families, who might cry a little more upon reading a =
book about=20
a 16-year-old ache. But Ann Hipp, Colleen's mother, appreciated Scott =
DeMaria=20
asking the family for permission to write the book and called her "an=20
inspiration."
Hipp hasn't read the book but looks forward to =
doing so=20
during a quiet family vacation later this month. She hopes reliving =
those=20
painful memories might have the same effect that meeting a former Notre =
Dame=20
athlete from her hometown of St. Louis once had: Later that night, Hipp =
dreamed=20
about Colleen hugging her.
"Maybe I'll have another one of those =
dreams=20
after reading [the book] and connecting with a Notre Dame memory," Hipp=20
said.
Scott DeMaria says she has dreams, too, about crashing in =
planes,=20
trains and cars but never buses. She also has dreamed often about the =
friends=20
she lost that night, friends whose deaths still shape her =
life.
"Whenever=20
I go to South Bend, for example, Meghan's grave is the first place I go =
whether=20
it's 10 a.m. or 10 at night," Scott DeMaria said. "I've never gone back =
there=20
without stopping. Sometimes it's for five minutes, sometimes it's for =
45. But=20
it's a place that always has called me."
The calling to write a =
book felt=20
just as powerful to her. More than anything, the voice of Haley Scott =
DeMaria=20
emerging after 214 pages reflects that strength.
Copyright =C2=A9 2008,
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